For she said within herself, If I may but touch garment, I shall be whole. Matthew 9:21
The ease of this poor woman was quite desperate. Many painful operations she had undergone, in hope of a cure. Her money was all spent in procuring remedies. Her disorder grew worse and worse. All human hope and help failed. Death seemed to approach her with great speed. But, strange thought! "If I may but touch the garment" of that man surrounded by yonder crowd, I shall certainly be healed. Surprising to think of, a cure from a touch! a touch not of his person, but his garment! How can nature and reason account for this?
Had she consulted flesh and blood, surely she would have concluded, this suggestion is only mere fancy, and will end in delusion. Had she consulted eminent physicians or learned pharisees about her thoughts, doubtless they would have pronounced Jesus a deceiver, her an enthusiast, and advised proper remedies to her as lunatic But the Holy Spirit had, inwardly, made Christ known unto her. She saw somewhat of his glory. Her mind was disposed towards him. She believed in her heart his power to heal her. She speaks within herself her thoughts concerning him. She came with trembling feet; touched him with a fearful heart; but departed with triumph.
How secret are the operations of the Spirit in working faith in the hearts of sinners! "No man can come unto me, (saith Jesus,) except the Father draw him?" John 6:44. A sight of Christ is of special grace. The first thought of help and hope in Jesus for sinners is from the word of truth, and by the power of the Spirit. The soul soon evidences itself to have "the faith of God's elect;" for, under a sight and sense of its desperate state and ruined condition, it speaks within itself of going to Jesus, and him only, for pardon and salvation.
Yet the poor heart is often exercised with an if; if I did but believe in him, if I may but touch him, if I did but feel in myself that I was healed of my sin and plague, O how I should rejoice! Well, though the soul is opposed by a crowd of difficulties, yet will it not be satisfied till it breaks through all earthly opposition and finds peace in Jesus; till it hears the voice of its Beloved speaking pardon and comfort by his word. When, like Isaiah, the soul cries, "Wo is me, I am undone," it cannot rest till with him also, a live coal from the altar of Jesus' love is laid upon his mouth, and his language is changed to "I am saved by Jesus." For "lo this hath touched thy lips, and thy sin is purged." Isa. 6:7.
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